When Is It Necessary To Consult With A Child?

Many parents probably feel that a large portion of the days are spent commanding the child and arguing with him. It is common for parents to repeatedly have to command a child to eat their plates empty or go to sleep. In certain situations, the child must obey the word of his or her parents without hesitation, but in what matters is it worth giving in to the child and what are the situations in which it is worth negotiating with the child?

Both too strict and too permissive a method of rearing can be detrimental to a child. Reasonableness is thus key to both upbringing and creating a home atmosphere. Negotiation can serve as a learning experience for a child as he or she learns through it to collaborate and understand different perspectives.

When is it necessary to consult with the child?

It is common for a child to try to oppose decisions made by a parent. He tests the will of his parents and tries to change it by any means. For example, she can use teasing, crying, or expressions of affection to manipulate her parents to get what she wants. In such situations, it is important for parents to stick to the rules of the home and justify to the child why they were created. Demonstrating empathy and understanding can make a child react more positively, even if he or she disagrees with the parent.

In certain situations, the child stays firmly in his or her own position, in which case the parent should consider whether he or she should give in a little. If the matter being negotiated does not have negative consequences or the negotiation is to the benefit of both parties, negotiation with the child may be worthwhile. Within the family, as in life in general, it is important to make a positive connection with the people around you. The key is to find a solution that takes the child’s opinion into account so that it does not override the parent’s authority. There are also many situations where consultation with the child is not possible or necessary, and such situations should not repeatedly lead to conflict. It is the responsibility of parents to learn to deal with the child’s differing thoughts.

Useful methods for negotiating with a child

Minimizing conflict situations

The first step is to be able to identify the moment when you agree with the child. Sometimes the subject of the dispute is much smaller and more harmless than it is imagined to be. By agreeing on the positive aspects of the situation, the attachment relationship between the child and the parent is strengthened. This method is especially useful with children in adolescence or approaching adolescence.

Explaining your point of view

When a parent makes a decision that the child does not agree with, it is a good idea for him or her to argue the matter clearly to the child. Even if the child does not fully accept the decision, he or she understands that the parent is acting fairly, and not just to exercise his or her authority.

Considering the answers

A small child might ask ten different things within a few minutes. In a flood of questions, the parent easily answers “no” or ignores the questions completely. However, it is best to analyze the child’s question and answer it appropriately. So you should take a deep breath, think about the pros and cons, and only then make a decision.

Consistency and steadfastness

For example, a child may put pressure on their parent by teasing, using ugly language, shouting, or crying. While the situation can be frustrating, it is important not to give in to the child, otherwise he or she will quickly learn to get what he or she wants by behaving badly. If a child has been warned of the consequences of misconduct, those consequences must be adhered to.

The parent determines

It is the parent’s responsibility not only to resolve conflicts and make decisions, but also to ensure the child’s safety and good upbringing. There is no reason to feel guilty, even if one does not please the child with all the decisions he makes.

Negotiation can help the child evaluate the facts and teach him or her to make sensible decisions. At its best, negotiation helps the child see that he or she can resolve disagreements without having to resort to quarreling with loved ones. The child learns to respect the decisions of the parents and to trust the alternative solutions they offer.